Their Honors have had a productive week, issuing orders in all but a handful of the proceedings that last proceeded in Portland.  And one particular word is common to most of those orders, a word other than the usual suspects (e.g., “re”, “Heyburn”, “litigation”, “schedule”, “centralization”, “isosceles”*).  That word is “denied.”  Their Honors have slugged 11 out of 14 proceedings off their dockets this week, for a Ruthian .786 slugging average.

Much to the delight of the defendants on its dozens of complaints, the sluggees include the movant in MDL 2462, Brandywine Communications, whom defendants accused of appalling procedural misconduct in their Panel submissions.  imPaneled is most pleased that Their Honors noted that in denying the motion, and that they rewarded the defense attorney who informed them at the hearing that “the term of art [for Brandywine] is ‘patent troll.’” Practice note: Name-calling is an effective tool when arguing before the Panel, so long as said names are terms of art.

imPaneled is less pleased with the Panel’s denial of defendants’ motion in MDL 2463, In re Fresh Dairy Products Antitrust Litigation (No. II), in which plaintiffs’ counsel voluntarily dismissed an earlier action after its § 1404 transfer to defendants’ preferred court, only to refile with new plaintiffs in yet another court.  Defendants’ scorched-earth attack on that and other procedural maneuvers perhaps incorporated excessive substantive argument, which induced Their Honors to reach far into the past: “‘[[T]]he framers of Section 1407 did not contemplate that the Panel would decide the merits of the actions before it and neither the statute nor the implementing Rules of the Panel are drafted to allow for such determinations.’ In re Kauffman Mut. Fund Actions, 337 F. Supp. 1337, 1339-40 (J.P.M.L. 1972).”

The Panel did not rely on that reasoning in denying the non-settling plaintiffs’ motion in MDL 2468, In re Pilot Flying J Fuel Rebate Contract Litigation.** But it was clearly lurking in the background, as Their Honors held that the parties and various presiding judges should resolve issues arising from the pending settlement before the Panel weighs in.

imPaneled is most distressed with the Panel’s denial of plaintiffs’ motion in MDL 2453, In re Adderall XR Marketing, Sales Practices and Antitrust Litigation–but not for reasons that have anything to do with nonsense like convenience, justice and efficiency.  MDL 2453 was the first proceeding in which imPaneled speculated publicly as to the result based on the hearing–and we got it wrong.  Perhaps we should have been less taken with Judge Barbadoro’s skewering of defense counsel, and more taken with the fact that plaintiffs in the various actions all assert indirect claims based on the statutes of different states.  Their Honors were more taken with the latter.  Finally, we kind of got one right, when we lauded Judge Barbadoro for chiding plaintiffs’ counsel in MDL 2454, In re Franck’s Lab, Inc., Products Liability Litigation.  Their Honors granted defendants’ motion to centralize those cases in the E.D. La.

More Portland Panel postmortem to come after the last few orders hit the dockets.  Then perhaps imPaneled can turn back to some good lead counsel fights.  In the meantime, if you’re not aware of any such fights, feel free to start one.

* – Not really.  imPaneled just wanted to make sure you were reading carefully.

** – Background as to that ugliness is here.